IS YOUR CHILD AGGRESSIVE? HOW TO TONE HIM DOWN?
IS YOUR CHILD AGGRESSIVE? HOW TO TONE HIM DOWN?A toddler is insatiably curious—he wants to find out what will happen if he does a certain thing. So he experiments all the time—he pulls at someone’s hair, pushes others to get what he wants, snatches away something that he likes. But it is up to you as parents to set limits. Your toddler is not yet able to curb his instincts—you will need to help him.
PAY ATTENTION TO GOOD BEHAVIOR:
A toddler tries to get attention by aggressive behavior like hitting, biting and shoving. Remove him physically from the scene if he is likely to harm someone else. Don’t give him the attention that he is angling for and carry on with your work. If he does something good, praise him to the skies. This will serve as an incentive for him to behave well and to discard his aggressiveness.
VALIDATE YOUR CHILD’S FEELINGS:
Tell him that it is alright to feel angry when someone snatches away his toy or to feel sad and happy. Hug and comfort him. At the same time, explain that it is never ok to hit others, to push or shove others or to snatch others’ things.
ENCOURAGE YOUR CHILD TO PUT HIS FEELINGS IN WORDS OR DRAWINGS:
Help him with vocabulary—to say,” I am sad”, “I am angry”, “ I am happy” etc. give him a piece of paper and a crayon. Help him to make faces showing all these emotions .Write the words sad, angry or happy below each in big letters. This is a way of releasing his feelings.
DEAL WITH BOREDOM:
Anticipate his boredom and respond with a challenging activity—before a typhoon occurs!
Help your child learn the skills needed for everyday living –social, dressing, playing and eating skills—so that his frustration and aggression are reduced.
Provide opportunities for venting by allowing him to pound away at a pillow or by letting him do kiddy aerobics—simply jumping around.
CHANGE THE PACE:
When free, plays become a medium for all fist fight between peers, change the activity. Let them do an adult-supervised activity—like painting.
BE A MODEL OF GENTLENESS:
The best way to teach civilized social skills is to consistently use them yourself.
Take a break to sit quietly with your toddler, listening to soft music, cuddling him and talking to him.
KNOW WHEN TO STEP IN AND WHEN TO STAY OUT:
As far as possible let children handle their own conflicts. If it comes to blows, step in.
BE NEITHER HARSH NOR TOO SOFT:
Middle of the road discipline, leads to a well behaved child.
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